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    Snow White's Poison Bite - The Story of Kristy Killings ( 1 / 5 )

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    Envy
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    Snow White's Poison Bite - The Story of Kristy Killings ( 1 / 5 )

    Post by Envy on Sun Jan 13, 2013 7:53 pm

    Imagine the beleaguering little brother of every scene-esque band in Post-Hardcore / Metalcore, complete with the manufactured look, sound and attitude to sell. Now imagine that with a rusty hook gauged in your ear and you have Snow White’s Poison Bite.

    Following the latest batch of hot-topic style trends is the ”Undead” Post-Hardcore band, Snow White’s Poison Bite. It’s as though they took more time to copy the most annoying aspects from every detestable act in the genre and mimic them down to the last repetitive synth loop. There is nothing redeemable about this album and this band would be very unlikely to act on any potential they could have possibly had in the first place.

    The most despicable and horrendous part of this entire album are the vocals, jumping between faux shout choruses, yelling segments while all at the same time sounding like the off-shot baby of Gerard Way and Ronnie Radke rip-roaring drunk at a monster truck rally is no easy feat. His voice lacks any sort of tone and strains constantly in an effort to match the cookie-cutter music, with completely unsuccessful results. An example being his awkward nasally chant in the beginning of ”Down in the Morgue.” Chants like that are common throughout the album, and at no time create anything even remotely resembling a melody. The harsh vocals can at times be acceptable, but in the end are largely irritating and range between cheesy lows and forced highs, in short they are almost entirely unnecessary, but then again the cleans are by far worse. The lyricism is just as atrocious, not only is it bland and repetitive, but it’s ridiculously straightforward and cringe-worthy and resembles what would be considered an excerpt from a 16 year old girl’s diary, except more exaggerated.

    Quote:
    ”It's prom night, 6 P.M.
    She's waiting for her date
    To pick her up in a fancy car
    The captain of the football team

    Feels like the dream
    It's time to dance, dance, dance
    But she has lost her chance
    Because this guy is so mean
    She won't be coming queen tonight
    Oh my God she cried..!” (Track 4: The End of Prom Night)

    The instrumentals can only be described as sheer, uninspired, unorganized and unfocused pandemonium. Not only are they unable to make any technically interesting or melodic segments, but they aren’t even able to keep to one genre. They constantly switch between poppy choruses consisting of nothing but chugging and overused synth sections to pseudo-deathcore littered with unimaginative breakdowns. The guitars rarely do anything interesting and mainly keep to the same patterns while the drums are downtrodden and never venture beyond the same arrangements. Any attempts to be technical on the album are short-lived and add nothing to the effect of the songs in general. Another thing that this band attempts to do is create atmosphere with completely out of place musicality, such as in the intro "Symphonies for the Damned", and it's definitely not as sinister as it sounds. Their attempts at depth consist of nothing but over-used Halloween bargain store sounds with random female screams and down-tuned guitar chugs. It's no symphony, more along the lines of something whipped up in a couple hours in an attempt to create a lead-in for their bromidic haunt shop material.

    In short, this the quintessential example of a band who is literally carved by the trends of the time, except unlike others, this band doesn’t have the occasional melodic segment, catchy solo or strong vocals. The only memorable moments you will have listening to this album, are the belly laughs that it induces if you attempt to take it seriously.


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    skeletorissatan

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    Re: Snow White's Poison Bite - The Story of Kristy Killings ( 1 / 5 )

    Post by skeletorissatan on Mon Jan 14, 2013 4:33 am

    this band sucks so much dick that they should be called Elton Mercury. pos'd hard
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    Re: Snow White's Poison Bite - The Story of Kristy Killings ( 1 / 5 )

    Post by ownowbrowncow on Thu Jan 24, 2013 2:00 am

    skeletorissatan wrote:this band sucks so much dick that they should be called Elton Mercury. pos'd hard
    did you just combine freddy mercury and elton john into one person and say they suck? are you the dumbest most musically illiterate person on the face of the planet?

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